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Climbing Disciplines:
Sport Climbing:
Screening test for n00bs:
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jt512
Aug 11, 2009, 11:46 AM
Views: 15027
Registered: Apr 11, 2001
Posts: 21781
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You're at the sport crag waiting for your partner to arrive, an unkown climber walks up to you, and asks, "Hey, you want a belay?" You're on the spot. You'd like to get a warm-up burn in, but you don't want to end up on the wrong end of some hapless gymbie's rope. If you hesitate before answering, you risk offense. You must be definitive. It's either got to be, "Sure, that would be great," or "No thanks. I'm still a little hungover." You need a way to size up your potential partner that is systematic, fast, and accurate. In short, you need a
Screening Test for N00bs
Through years of keen observation, I have identified 10 key risk factors for n00bs. Give the climber the number of points indicated for each risk factor. Then sum the points to arrive at the climber's n00b risk score.
Risk factor 1: Helmet
Climber has a helmet at the crag: 2 points
Climber is wearing a helmet belaying: 10 points
Climber wore a helmet on the approach: 25 points
Climber got out of car wearing helmet: 100 points
Risk factor 2: Climbing shoes
Climber's shoes, if not slippers, are made from natural leather: 10 points*
Climber's shoes are made by Mad Rock: 10 points
*Exception 1: Climber's shoes are Firés: -50 points
*Exception 2: Climber's shoes are EBs: -100 points
Risk factor 3: Harness
Any modern harness not made by Petzl: 5 points
Risk factor 4: Belay device(s)
Give the climber 10^n points, where n is the number of belay devices on the climber's harness in excess of one.
In addition:
Does not have a grigri: 10 points
Has a Cinch: 10 points
Has a device whose brand name is "ATC" followed by something: 10 points
Risk factor 5: Quick draws
Anything other than Petzl: 5 points
Dogbones too skinny to grab: 10 points
Petzl logo on dogbones: -50 points
Risk factor 6: Rope bag
Non-Metolius: 5 points
None: 20 points
Risk factor 7: Stick clip
None: 10 points
Risk factor 8: Unnecessary equipment
10^n points, where n is the number of items girth hitched to the climber's harness
10 points for each locking carabiner on the climber's harness not clipped to a belay device
50 points for each quick link on the climber's harness
Risk factor 9: REI
1 point for each appearance of the REI logo on the climber's gear
20 points for each appearance of an REI price tag on the climber's gear
100 points for an REI shopping bag containing the climber's gear
Risk factor 10: The color red
1 point for each red item among the climber's gear, unless the gear is unscratched; then, 10 points.
Red grigri: 15 points
Scoring:
100 or more: Run away.
50–99 points: High n00b probability. Climb with at your own risk.
25–49 points: Possibly a n00b or a visiting trad climber.
0–24 points: Probably an experienced sport climber.
Less than 0: The climber probably knows more about climbing than you do.
(This post was edited by jt512 on Aug 12, 2009, 6:23 PM)
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Edit Log:
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Post edited by jt512
() on Aug 11, 2009, 12:25 PM
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Post edited by jt512
() on Aug 11, 2009, 12:28 PM
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Post edited by jt512
() on Aug 12, 2009, 6:23 PM
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