Forums: Community: Campground:
The n00bs must be culled
RSS FeedRSS Feeds for Campground

Premier Sponsor:

 
First page Previous page 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Next page Last page  View All


the_leech


Mar 28, 2007, 9:26 PM
Post #1 of 206 (9445 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Feb 7, 2007
Posts: 392

The n00bs must be culled
Report this Post
Can't Post

Maybe we shouldn’t kill them directly, but we’ve got to do something about the influx of n00bs that increases exponentially every day.

I know we’ve all done this at least once... There’s a nice guy at work who says that he wants to come climbing some time. So you take him outside, show him the ropes, and have a good time. But what have you really done? You’ve created another n00b, that’s what.

Maybe you’ve seriously responded to an rc.com thread with a question like, “How do I make a toprope anchor?” You offered friendly, helpful advice and went on feeling good about yourself. Meanwhile, all you’ve done is support a n00b and encouraged him to climb more.

Have you noticed how the crags get more crowded each year? Are you tired of the throngs dominating popular routes with topropes all day?

Have you noticed how much more frequently you top out, only to see a n00b on a route near you scrambling to hook up a funky, sketchy anchor that would have been a straightforward setup for anyone with even a modicum of experience?

Do you live in fear of having to partake in yet another rescue because some clueless leader and his incompetent belayer come tumbling down and ruin your day?

There’s a solution, people. Listen up.

1. Stop taking new people climbing. Maybe you do it to be nice, find new partners, or perhaps you just feel better about yourself if you climb with less-experienced people. I don’t care what the reason is. Knock it off! There are enough climbers here now, and plenty of partners to go around. Pull from the existing pool.

2. Ask rc.com to ban the Beginner’s Forum altogether. If that is not acceptable, the administrators should at least establish an auto-delete function for all thread titles that start with “How do I…” and “What shoes…” and other frequently used n00b titles.

3. Stop encouraging n00bs online. These online forums seem to be the primary way that gym n00bs develop the “experience” to venture outdoors. I know it’s our nature to be helpful, but this has to stop. Respond to all n00b questions with “STFU n00b!” That’s it. Say no more.

4. Carry the attitude of discouragement wherever you go. If you see some n00b giving a bad belay or struggling up a route with poor technique, refrain from giving helpful advice. Let them struggle or drop their n00b partner. Cull the n00bs. That’s what this is all about. Just be sure to move away from them so you don’t have to waste your day involved in a n00b rescue or recovery.

5. Boycott climbing gyms. This is a big sacrifice, I know. Especially if you live in an area without year-round outdoor climbing. But you know as well as I do that climbing gyms are the biggest producers of n00bs nowadays.

6. If you must use a climbing gym, refer to #4. In fact, feel free to be a dick to the n00bs you meet there. Make them feel unwelcome, perhaps even threatened. This attitude (called “localism” among surfers) is effective at keeping gumbies off the good surf breaks. We need to carry this attitude into climbing as well.

Some may wonder how you identify a n00b. If you have to ask this question, you likely are one of them. So STFU and find a new way to spend your free time!

These are just a few suggestions off the top of my head. I’d love to hear other suggestions and ideas. The important thing is that we work together to address this problem. We must cull the n00bs. The quality of our climbing future is at stake.


salamanizer


Mar 28, 2007, 10:06 PM
Post #2 of 206 (9412 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Jul 2, 2004
Posts: 879

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

Maybe someone should have killed you, or at least discouraged you several years back.

N00bs don't bother me, they help fuel the market for better gear and their never on the routes I want to do.


rockguide


Mar 28, 2007, 10:16 PM
Post #3 of 206 (9399 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Nov 8, 2004
Posts: 1358

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

Let the door hit your ass on the way out.


(This post was edited by rockguide on Mar 28, 2007, 10:23 PM)


squamishdirtbag


Mar 28, 2007, 10:21 PM
Post #4 of 206 (9385 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Jul 17, 2005
Posts: 115

Re: [rockguide] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

What a hilarious threadLaugh
Ok 'STFU Noob' gotcha won't forget.


ccard257


Mar 28, 2007, 10:22 PM
Post #5 of 206 (9385 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Aug 6, 2005
Posts: 25

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

STFU n00b
Tongue


elnero


Mar 28, 2007, 10:27 PM
Post #6 of 206 (9375 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Feb 28, 2006
Posts: 191

Re: [salamanizer] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

it's not clever enough for it to be intentionally funny.. so.. he must be serious?


climbsomething


Mar 28, 2007, 10:32 PM
Post #7 of 206 (9370 views)
Shortcut

Registered: May 29, 2002
Posts: 8588

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

the_leech is multi-talented!

You go on with your bad Carhartts-wearing self!

xoxo


jt512


Mar 28, 2007, 10:35 PM
Post #8 of 206 (9367 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Apr 11, 2001
Posts: 21892

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

the_leech wrote:
Carry the attitude of discouragement wherever you go.

That has a nice ring to it. It should be worked into a signature, t-shirt, bumper sticker, or something.

Jay


climbsomething


Mar 28, 2007, 10:39 PM
Post #9 of 206 (9358 views)
Shortcut

Registered: May 29, 2002
Posts: 8588

Re: [climbsomething] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

...and don't forget to DURRRRR, and maybe even UH-HURRRRRR now and then.

Sly

your so elitist omg maybe if you stop coming to the jim it will be less crowded for me and anyways the best climber is the 1 whose having the most fun!


bent_gate


Mar 28, 2007, 10:43 PM
Post #10 of 206 (9352 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Jul 1, 2004
Posts: 2620

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

Well, this is a classic example of what happens when our climbing community doesn’t take the time to implement a comprehensive 'n00b Management Plan'.

A first step is to address the food source that attracts them to begin with. n00bs naturally feed on the sympathies of those with an overabundance of climbing fulfillment. Like a baby bird stimulating the mother to regurgitate a tasty meal, a co-worker will ask the climber to tell a story of their exciting weekend exploits. The budding n00b will then admiringly accept the morsel and use it as an opportunity to point out how they have always wanted to try that. Slowly being drawn into a motherly role, the climber feels a necessity to continue to nurture the budding n00b with offers to take them to a safe learning and growing environment like a climbing gym. And of course we know where it goes from there...

So the climber needs to be educated on the true nature of the n00b. Like a Cuckoo egg that has been laid in another birds nest, the climber may be unaware that the n00b has taken up home and is ready to suck up all the resources it can get.

Protecting the Nest-

Recommendation 1:
The climber should be aware of its environment at all times, and be on the watch for those foreign species trying to plant themselves within its domain.

Recommendation 2:
If stimulated to regurgitate, choke back all epics by keeping the mouth tightly closed.

Recommendation 3:
Whenever possible steer budding n00bs towards another nest, such as Paintball or Ultimate Frisbee.

These are beginning strokes of a comprehensive 'n00b Management Plan'

The next section needed –Incubator Reform (the gym)…


ihategrigris


Mar 28, 2007, 10:50 PM
Post #11 of 206 (9342 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Jan 6, 2005
Posts: 757

Re: [jt512] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

jt512 wrote:
the_leech wrote:
Carry the attitude of discouragement wherever you go.

That has a nice ring to it. It should be worked into a signature, t-shirt, bumper sticker, or something.

Jay

Haha, Done and Done


caughtinside


Mar 28, 2007, 10:59 PM
Post #12 of 206 (9333 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Jan 8, 2003
Posts: 30411

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

the leech, I was 100% on board with you until I saw this:

the_leech wrote:

1. Stop taking new people climbing. Maybe you do it to be nice, find new partners, or perhaps you just feel better about yourself if you climb with less-experienced people. I don’t care what the reason is. Knock it off! There are enough climbers here now, and plenty of partners to go around. Pull from the existing pool.

now, in theory, I agree with you. however, I really need to introduce more hot chicks to climbing. No, you don't understand, I NEED this man, so DON"T BLOW IT FOR ME. Please. I'm begging you. I won't take anyone else, I promise. Just let me take this sexy bimbo climbing. Just once. Please. I NEED THIS MAN.


bbentley77


Mar 28, 2007, 11:16 PM
Post #13 of 206 (9321 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Dec 31, 2006
Posts: 145

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

the_leech wrote:
Are you tired of the throngs dominating popular routes with topropes all day?

Maybe if you could climb harder than 5.10 after all those years you've been climbing, you wouldn't be on the same routes as said noobs in the first place. If you actually challenged yourself to progress with all of your experience, you shouldn't have to worry about these noob creatures shitting on your routes, because they wouldn't be attempting them. So grow a pair of balls and get off the 5.10 or less noob routes BIATCH!

Everything else was funny as hell though Laugh. Oh and STFU NOOB!


(This post was edited by bbentley77 on Mar 28, 2007, 11:29 PM)


majid_sabet


Mar 28, 2007, 11:53 PM
Post #14 of 206 (9294 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Dec 12, 2002
Posts: 8358

Re: [bbentley77] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

Is this proper for TR?

I am trying to rig it this weekend and do some outdoor TR but not sure if I got all of them in the right format, help me please

Thanks

[URL=http://imageshack.us]


(This post was edited by majid_sabet on Mar 28, 2007, 11:55 PM)


thomasribiere


Mar 29, 2007, 3:40 AM
Post #15 of 206 (9263 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Aug 24, 2002
Posts: 9305

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

trophy


dlintz


Mar 29, 2007, 4:17 AM
Post #16 of 206 (9251 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Sep 9, 2002
Posts: 1980

Re: [majid_sabet] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

majid_sabet wrote:
Is this proper for TR?

I am trying to rig it this weekend and do some outdoor TR but not sure if I got all of them in the right format, help me please

Thanks

[URL=http://imageshack.us]

Just double up all your biners and you'll be set, you should probably double up those pulleys also. Wink

d.


wanderlustmd


Mar 29, 2007, 4:18 AM
Post #17 of 206 (9251 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Oct 24, 2006
Posts: 8149

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

the_leech wrote:
3. Stop encouraging n00bs online. These online forums seem to be the primary way that gym n00bs develop the “experience” to venture outdoors. I know it’s our nature to be helpful, but this has to stop. Respond to all n00b questions with “STFU n00b!” That’s it. Say no more.

4. Carry the attitude of discouragement wherever you go. If you see some n00b giving a bad belay or struggling up a route with poor technique, refrain from giving helpful advice. Let them struggle or drop their n00b partner. Cull the n00bs. That’s what this is all about. Just be sure to move away from them so you don’t have to waste your day involved in a n00b rescue or recovery.

5. Boycott climbing gyms. This is a big sacrifice, I know. Especially if you live in an area without year-round outdoor climbing. But you know as well as I do that climbing gyms are the biggest producers of n00bs nowadays.

6. If you must use a climbing gym, refer to #4. In fact, feel free to be a dick to the n00bs you meet there. Make them feel unwelcome, perhaps even threatened. This attitude (called “localism” among surfers) is effective at keeping gumbies off the good surf breaks. We need to carry this attitude into climbing as well.

Some may wonder how you identify a n00b. If you have to ask this question, you likely are one of them. So STFU and find a new way to spend your free time!

These are just a few suggestions off the top of my head. I’d love to hear other suggestions and ideas. The important thing is that we work together to address this problem. We must cull the n00bs. The quality of our climbing future is at stake.

Angelic

I hope you're trolling, but if you're not....STFU noob. Were you beaten as a child?


Partner srwings


Mar 29, 2007, 5:09 AM
Post #18 of 206 (9227 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Jun 27, 2004
Posts: 247

Re: [elnero] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

elnero wrote:
it's not clever enough for it to be intentionally funny.. so.. he must be serious?

I think it's very tongue in cheek.


banjo_jon


Mar 29, 2007, 5:59 AM
Post #19 of 206 (9175 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Sep 21, 2006
Posts: 28

Re: [srwings] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

better make sure that tire is an all terrain or you're screwed.


Partner j_ung


Mar 29, 2007, 5:59 AM
Post #20 of 206 (9175 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Nov 21, 2003
Posts: 18687

Re: [srwings] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

Dood, masterful. I don't care how many serious responses it gets, this is now my favorite troll of all time.


girl_lostInVA


Mar 29, 2007, 6:19 AM
Post #21 of 206 (9152 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Nov 27, 2006
Posts: 137

Re: [caughtinside] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

caughtinside wrote:
now, in theory, I agree with you. however, I really need to introduce more hot chicks to climbing.

you should definitely have a special exemption for attractive girls and hot chick noobs...always take them climbing Laugh


Power_Tie


Mar 29, 2007, 8:37 AM
Post #22 of 206 (9072 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Jan 16, 2007
Posts: 30

Re: [girl_lostInVA] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

wow, what a very poor and dangerous attitude you have. I hope you get help for that.


girl_lostInVA


Mar 29, 2007, 8:41 AM
Post #23 of 206 (9061 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Nov 27, 2006
Posts: 137

Re: [Power_Tie] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

Power_Tie wrote:
wow, what a very poor and dangerous attitude you have. I hope you get help for that.

Crazy geesh...learn to take a joke


Power_Tie


Mar 29, 2007, 8:45 AM
Post #24 of 206 (9042 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Jan 16, 2007
Posts: 30

Re: [girl_lostInVA] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

girl_lostInVA wrote:
Power_Tie wrote:
wow, what a very poor and dangerous attitude you have. I hope you get help for that.

Crazy geesh...learn to take a joke

I am sorry, I did not mean you! I was referring to this leech character. I would agree that the more cute n00bettes we can get in climbing, the better.


bigfatrock


Mar 29, 2007, 8:48 AM
Post #25 of 206 (9030 views)
Shortcut

Registered: Aug 2, 2006
Posts: 1321

Re: [the_leech] The n00bs must be culled [In reply to]
Report this Post
Can't Post

1. So your telling me you were never a n00b? You just woke up one morning with the ability to climb 5.14 and had all knowledge of climbing innate withing you?

2. If everybody took your suggestion the race of climbers would die off in about 30-50 years. Just guessing on the numbers there, but you get the idea.

3. If you love climbing as much as you seem to why not get out and climb rather than trolling.

First page Previous page 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Next page Last page  View All

Forums : Community : Campground

 


Search for (options)

Log In:

Username:
Password: Remember me:

Go Register
Go Lost Password?



Follow us on Twiter Become a Fan on Facebook