For the tim guy, what would not be funny is if 'in the memory of' forum was the only one at rc.com to meet your high standard. So I shouldn't complain about my discomfort while people post such serious subjects like who is the hottest climbing chick/dude and where to buy a pink climbing shoes? Once again, thicker skin would be so nice.

As far as grunting I grunt in general. I for sure grunt when I play raquetball. But just the other day, some guy at the gym was like, "yeah, we call that girl (not referring to me) the 'orgasmic girl.' You know, she is just trying to get attention from men." For the record, I think most women climbers don't make noises to attract men. I certainly don't. *sigh*

And you know what? I climb the same climb where someone said I sounded like I was giving birth with a conscious effort not to make noises, and what did I do at the crux?

Fell.

Further evidence that you shouldn't let it bother you.

Personally, I am a mostly quiet climber but I am sometimes surprised at some of the yelps that erupt out of my throat when I take a fall or pull a hard move. And even on some of those rare occasions, I have heard people make comments, but only in the gym and not on real rock. So, in Cle03m's case maybe they are just showing her that they are jealous, but in a really lame way!


I think this is further evidence that should bother everybody. Cle03m most likely posted this in the ladies room because many men can't relate to every action they take as being put into a sexual context. It's really not fun.

Think about it... Someone posts up about only liking a female belayer so he can get a glimpse down her shirt... Others refer to fear or weakness in terms of a female body part, as if fear and weakness are female traits.

This is crap that we have to put up with all the time and I think it's important for everyone to speak up about it when they see it. And yes, even to the person making the lame comments.

I don't know, Tiff. To make the assumption that there are no pressures placed on men because they're men is kind of foolish.

You very likely don't see the non-verbal communication that goes on even in our gym.

Do I know where I stand with regards to those ripped boulderers who can jump on any 5.11 that I'm hangdogging? You betcha I do, and it likely isn't because I simply know they are better than me. Even in an gentile conversation among friends, if I talk about how a route or particular move is tough for me then I may get verbal sympathy but the look in his eye is saying, "I'm being nice but I think you're a wimp."

Seriously, are you going to try and change every single one who makes a lousy comment?

It's the old adage of you can't love anyone else unless you love yourself first.

It's not foolish. I'm saying that it's a whole different topic. The OP is saying that she is receiving unwanted sexual comments. I don't think that you can relate to that. I don't think that you can compare your life experiences to this, no matter how crappy those experiences may be.

I am a woman and a climber. I am very aware of chest thumping and people comparing themselves to others. If I am getting the elitist vibe from someone, I just don't talk with her anymore. If my interactions with someone make me feel badly about myself, in or out of climbing, then I don't interact with that person anymore.

You will be a happier climber if you stop comparing yourself to other people. But, again, don't you think that getting a 'look' after talking about a tough move is a lot different than being openly harassed in public? You were soliciting a conversation with someone. The OP wasn't looking for sexual comments on her vocal climbing style. It's different.

If I don't comment on these things when they happen, then they will keep happening. Maybe the person who happens to be saying these things hasn't even thought of why it might be wrong or how gross and inappropriate his comments are to other people. You don't have to be mean when you bring these things up - but it does more harm than good not to address these issues when they happen. (If it persists, that's when it is time to get mean! )

If I didn't love myself very much, then I would let people get away with making harassing comments.

The Ladies Room: A place for women to share their experiences, ask female-related questions and get empowered in a safe environment. All are free to post, but keep maturity in mind.

Keep the above in mind, Tim.

To the OP, I squeek, scream and grunt while I climb. Often I find that after taking a whipper, everyone on the ground is too busy laughing at the noise I made as I flew through the air to let me know what I might have done to stay on the rock. I feel your pain. Sometimes a well placed "Shut the @&%! up and let me climb!" will do the trick to quiet the peanut gallery.

So I grunt when I climb. And this weekend, I got so much shitty comments about it. I am finally pushing my limits on gear leads, and I guess I was making some noises. It stared with "That must have been good for her" and the comments and snickering continued until I got upset or may be I just got too high to hear them. Next day, despite that I was leading one of the hardest routes I think I have ever lead, I kept getting distracted by what I may sound like. I guess I grunted anyways because apparantly someone on the next climb asked if someone is giving birth. It doesn't help that the comment was started by a husband of this girl who I would really like to climb more frequently together. I don't know why I get bothered so easily. I wish I could grow a thicker skin because I don't want the assholes to distract me from climbing. Just venting...

Yeah, there are more important things to worry about; but, does that mean I can't cry when I dislocate my shoulder because someone else just died from cancer? Every thing can be put in perspective. I thought his comment was out of place.

so, I probably shouldn't post in here since I'm not a lady, and cleo has sometimes accused me of not even being a gentleman, but I was cleo's belayer during the event in question.

She does make noise (as many of us do), and that day it was making some of us uneasy because the noises she makes while she is exerting are a little unusual. Not weird or twisted or anything, just a woman working hard and kind of squeaking, or grunting.

I personally think they are cute sounds, and have no problem with them as I am a grunter myself and have been known to do bad yodeling at anchors. But some of the others (mostly guys) standing around had not heard them before...and, guys being guys, we were all kind of looking at each other and smiling a little and trying not to say anything.

Cleo was leading a very vertical hard and sustained trad route, and doing awesome so I didn't want to distract her...but the sounds were making things a little tense on the ground.

I take full blame for starting it as I think I said, "is it just me, or does that sound like something else?" And it went downhill from there, but with no more participation from me. But at least it broke the tension and everyone busted up, at which point Cleo told us all to STFU and we all continued our day. And she did send the climb, pulling off a desperate offwidth move.

I had no idea it had hurt Cleo's feelings and I feel terrible for that. Still, thick skin can go a long way out there in the rough and tumble. I've certainly developed quite a thick hide over the years, so thick in fact that sometimes it's hard for me to be sensitive to the feelings of others, though I'm always trying.

Hope that helps Cleo, and I promise not to prowl into your ladies room again. By the way, you are climbing awesome! I can't believe how far you've come since spring. You went from never leading trad to on-sighting 10a's...amazing!

I take full blame for starting it as I think I said, "is it just me, or does that sound like something else?" And it went downhill from there, but with no more participation from me. But at least it broke the tension and everyone busted up, at which point Cleo told us all to STFU and we all continued our day. And she did send the climb, pulling off a desperate offwidth move.

So I grunt when I climb. And this weekend, I got so much shitty comments about it. I am finally pushing my limits on gear leads, and I guess I was making some noises. It stared with "That must have been good for her" and the comments and snickering continued until I got upset or may be I just got too high to hear them. Next day, despite that I was leading one of the hardest routes I think I have ever lead, I kept getting distracted by what I may sound like. I guess I grunted anyways because apparantly someone on the next climb asked if someone is giving birth. It doesn't help that the comment was started by a husband of this girl who I would really like to climb more frequently together. I don't know why I get bothered so easily. I wish I could grow a thicker skin because I don't want the assholes to distract me from climbing. Just venting...

Would you have said this if it had been a man grunting his way up? I would certainly not feel comfortable climbing with a group of guys who did this to me.

I would have. Actually, my double standard trends the opposite. When any of my male climbing partners get too vocal, I'm merciless. When female partners do it, I pretend not to notice.

I take full blame for starting it as I think I said, "is it just me, or does that sound like something else?" And it went downhill from there, but with no more participation from me. But at least it broke the tension and everyone busted up

I personally think they are cute sounds, and have no problem with them as I am a grunter myself and have been known to do bad yodeling at anchors. But some of the others (mostly guys) standing around had not heard them before...and, guys being guys, we were all kind of looking at each other and smiling a little and trying not to say anything.
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I take full blame for starting it as I think I said, "is it just me, or does that sound like something else?" And it went downhill from there, but with no more participation from me.

So I grunt when I climb. And this weekend, I got so much shitty comments about it. I am finally pushing my limits on gear leads, and I guess I was making some noises. It stared with "That must have been good for her" and the comments and snickering continued until I got upset or may be I just got too high to hear them. Next day, despite that I was leading one of the hardest routes I think I have ever lead, I kept getting distracted by what I may sound like. I guess I grunted anyways because apparantly someone on the next climb asked if someone is giving birth. It doesn't help that the comment was started by a husband of this girl who I would really like to climb more frequently together. I don't know why I get bothered so easily. I wish I could grow a thicker skin because I don't want the assholes to distract me from climbing. Just venting...