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pbjosh


Mar 24, 2003, 8:39 AM
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Lox, fortunately Mike is way cooler than you, and a hell of a freaking better climber. Sorry dude, that's all there is to this debate. He's probably the hardest climber on the site, with the possible exception of Steven Jeffries...

josh


jvb


Mar 28, 2003, 5:27 PM
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Jaws. California Night. Colombo Crack. Blackfinger. Bat Flake. Hear My Train 'A Comin. Mother Superior. Robbin's Crack. Digits Delight. Boulder 13. Maria's Crack. Crucible. Monkey Crack. Undertow. Drivin' South. Razor's Edge. Sickle Crack. Lie Detector. Greg's Problem. Manuel's Horror. The VP's Office. Firefly. The Ogre. The Test Tube. And on and on, these are just the ones with NAMES... for every one of these, there's another five obscure "secret" cracks guarded by manzanita doomsville approaches that maybe ten people know about. There is a certain stellar crag with an enormous amount of history that is the center of the known universe for Crack bouldering, and you're talking to a girl who knows. Two words: Mount Woodson. Take the Woodson pressure test, if you dare...and make sure to bring some tape.


bvb


Mar 28, 2003, 6:02 PM
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word.


camhead


Mar 28, 2003, 7:37 PM
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okay, the old farts have got me sold. looks I missed the best season for it this year, though.


pbjosh


Mar 28, 2003, 7:50 PM
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Jaws.
check, fantastic
California Night.
hard... makes Jaws seem like a hike
Colombo Crack.
haven't tried it...
Blackfinger.
good easy fun
Bat Flake.
way way hard
Hear My Train 'A Comin.
almost, makes California Night seem easy
Mother Superior.
makes bat flake look like 3rd class
Robbin's Crack.
the ueber classic
Digits Delight.
harder than it looks, rad
Boulder 13.
dunno this one
Maria's Crack.
not bad
Crucible.
fantastic. full body workout. right shoulder exfoliation treatment.
Monkey Crack.
way fun.
Undertow.
haven't found it
Drivin' South.
brutal, need to work on it some more
Razor's Edge.
pull hard and go fast
Sickle Crack.
way fun
Lie Detector.
so so so thin
Greg's Problem. (I assume you mean the OW next to John's Crack and Manuel's Horror)
looks gross, haven't tried it
Manuel's Horror.
good fun
The VP's Office.
haven't found it
Firefly.
haven't found it
The Ogre.
haven't tried it
The Test Tube.
looks awkward, haven't tried it

Don't forget:
Baby Robbins. Rockwork Orange. Out of Sight. Fall Semester. Right Long's Crack. Left Long's Crack. Hard As Nails (personal favorite). Aid's Victim. Mariah's OW. Eric's Crack. Slant Crack. Big Grunt. John's Crack. Starving in Stereo...

josh


curt


Mar 28, 2003, 11:54 PM
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Mike Paul,

When you read stuff like this, regarding your post....
In reply to:
OOOHhh...

Spray a little more for us please !!!1

It lets us know how COOL you are !!!!!111
Please bear in mind that Lox is somewhat socially retarded and lacks even a minimal understanding of the origins of bouldering.

And Lox, if you would like to see if you could keep up with Mike on even your best day of bouldering you could possibly have in your life--my money is on Mike.

Curt


no_limit


Mar 29, 2003, 7:34 AM
Post #32 of 213 (9198 views)
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There is some nice crack climbing at boat rock preserve in Atlanta Georgia.


bvb


Mar 29, 2003, 8:19 AM
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oooh ya, i am der loxter, and i make the easy party of mount woodson 5.11c sandbags in california, after which i am followed by many beautifuls women of the beaches and bikinis.

"i am not lox on bagel, i am acres of flappers held on with gallons of k-mart superglue and reams of blood-soaked tape 'round about my tenth try on widow bereft..."

but serously lox, if you're ever in the neighborhood, we can arrange for you a little tour... :twisted: being a hospital, er, i mean hospitable bunch...

we KNOW you'd do for us the same


pbjosh


Mar 29, 2003, 8:48 PM
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Went back to Woodson today for the first time in a couple of weeks... Came damned close to finally sending Hear My Train Acomin'. I've come to realize that going really fast for the first 3 moves makes it a lot easier. Did Aid's Victim finally...

Woodson rocks.

josh


bvb


Mar 30, 2003, 11:23 AM
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aid's vicitim eh? good job dood. yeah, i had hear my train ruthlessly wired, but the aid's victim shut me down 90% of the time. of the 30 or 40 times i got on it, i probably only did the thing maybe 5 times. i'd like to go back and try with modern shoes. and on hear my train you definately wanna rifle through the first moves. i get a sinker pinkie jam with my left hand, then pop-pop-pop do three "crack campus" moves to the pod. that's the most efficient beta we came up with. of course, we'd always do it as slow and static as we could, just for the extra style points. piggot and mp could flow though the first 15 feet in in total slow-mo, like geckos on downers. it was a thing to see.


camhead


Mar 30, 2003, 12:37 PM
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you guys have got me wetting myself on this mt. woodson place. seriously, bvb's photos rule.


pbjosh


Mar 30, 2003, 5:30 PM
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I've got some Woodson Pics here:

http://www.assimilation.org/...random/woodson-pics/

Unfortunately a lot of the classic cracks are missing...

josh


pbjosh


Mar 30, 2003, 5:35 PM
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"geckos on downers." That's probably the most interesting compliment I've ever heard ;) For Hear My Train Acomin', I always start with a good right middle finger jam and some moral support from my right ring finger but it's kind of a mono-jam, then go up to lousy left fingers in a slot and then try to make it to the pod w/ the right hand. But I always fall, I think I'm probably trying to do it too statically.

Had another good day out there today though, finally, after a lot of blood, sweat and curses, finished California Night. That thing's a bitch.

I really don't think Aid's Victim is that bad, just need a cool day to not pop out of the tips jams and off those thin edges.

Also ran into a guy up there who said that the mono on PhD was drilled which bummed me out a bunch to hear. Also said that a hold broke on Cool Jerk and was replaced with a rivet?!?! WTF?

josh


bvb


Mar 30, 2003, 5:49 PM
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yeah, the mono on PhD was manufactured. The guy who did it regretted it immediately, it wa the first time he'd ever done anything like that. To serve his penance and make peace with his god, he got up there and tried to lead it. This was before there were any bolts on the thing. He fell of the VERY last move, blew every piece, and hit the deck hard. lydia was belaying him and yelled "SHIT!! We all just stood there stunned. This guy, who was/is SO hard core, just sat up, then stood up, and grinned sheepishly at us and said "well, that was embarassing." He was gonna go up there and epoxy the hole in with gravel and glue, but never got around to it. It's not to late, though. PhD will for sure go with the natural holds -- hard 5.13 maybe?


lox


Mar 30, 2003, 10:07 PM
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Yeah. maybe. If you were seriously worth your weight in spray or EVEN CLOSE to being Steve Jefferies you'd be able to CONFIRM that grade for us.

Personally, I don't give a shit if you are Sharma hisself, if you come in here spraying like a fukkkin' n00b, you are worthy of ridicule. Being a hardcorps traddie/tr mt. woodson crack climber makes it evenmore humorous. I'll give you the hospital tour of Central Texas and see how you feel about all points disconnects at 25 feet. Get horizontal. No tape gloves required.

Come do 90 feet of horizontal offhands to offfists to fist to fist full extension dyno and we'll talk.

and being the "second best climber on this website" is quite possibly the LAMEST distinction one could use to validate their inherent climbing coolness. You, my friend, are a one-eyed man walking the eath in a 'KING OF THE BLIND DUMBASSES !!!!!!!11' tshirt.

Go you.


lox


Mar 30, 2003, 10:09 PM
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Ps. Climbing on eliminate manufactured routes ? CALICHOSS.

We call teh 2 manufactured problems in Central Texas the Fairfield Children.

lol.


camhead


Mar 30, 2003, 10:16 PM
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oh, and if any of you SoCal crackheads feel the need to come out to Texas for a lox-induced pissing contest, lemme know. Enchanted Rock has some pretty stout crack highballs.


lox


Mar 30, 2003, 10:20 PM
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As well as some deathfall horizontal fingercracks that have yet to see FAs.

Seriously.

if any 'hardcorps' rack climbers wanted to come to Texas, there are at least 4 FAs that you could do that would be the 'hardest limestone crack climbs' in the country.

You just gotta be strong like a crack climber AND strong like me.

Check the CenTex feature at www.bloodyflapper.com... think about THAT CRACK and ONLY the crack... none of this face climbing on the roof next to the crack. lol. UNDONe.

ha !


bvb


Mar 31, 2003, 6:07 AM
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Right on! the ARCTIC blast from the land of swamps, bugs, and moss-choked grimestone, and a three-month climbing season...although climbing in the summer with yer girlfreind...gittin all hot and sweaty an greasy...way out in the woods all alone...a couple a soft cushy pads right there...never mind that she's yer second cousin :P

OK, showdown at the OK corral. I'm ready for a little tex-mex crackage. I've seen the photos. Time for the George Bush Memorial Offwidth Challange! Bring it on. And tape is Aid.

But seriously, there's one part I missed...lox, you referred to someone who is the "second best climber on the site". Who is this person? And if that's the second best person, who's the best???


michaelpaul


Mar 31, 2003, 7:36 AM
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Yeah who the hell is this lox guy anyway? Just cause I talked about some problems that he probably hasn't even seen before, he gets all S___TY about it! I guess I would too if I called someone else a sprayer, but I had 1790 posts on this site! Get off the computer Poser and on the Crags! Reminds me of an old joke: What is the best thing to ever come out of Texas?.....Interstate 10! Wank On Goat Packer!


bvb


Mar 31, 2003, 7:55 AM
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yo vawto, TOUCHE! Lox goes down face first on the mat! 1...2...3...4...5...6...7.......can he get up???? :shock:

Lox, 1790 posts, my god say it ain't so! You know, carpal tunnel ain't so good for tugging on those little texmex monos.

Come on back now, come on back with a smackdown of that world-renowned texas hill country wit. and no hired guns, either -- gotta be your own material -- no ghostwriters moonlighting offa jay leno's staff!


lox


Mar 31, 2003, 8:16 AM
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In reply to:
He's probably the hardest climber on the site, with the possible exception of Steven Jeffries...

PBjosh said you weren't as hard as Steve Jeffries. I wouldn't claim to know who the "best" climber on this site is, not would I kiss ass like josh and claim YOU to be the second best... mos def based on what you have said here.

And HOW did you "shove my face in the mat again" ?

You recycled an old cali joke... (What's the best tihng to come our of cali? I10 ! lol! It works that way too !!!!!!1111) and called our season short.

It's been between 50 and 75 degrees in Texas since last October... and when it gets hot enough, we'll climb limestone up and out of the lake.

So like, you really got me and stuff...

In reply to:
I'm ready for a little tex-mex crackage. I've seen the photos. Time for the George Bush Memorial Offwidth Challange! Bring it on.

PM me your flight info. Unless you are a gaping gash of a man, internet shi++alker. Come before May, after 15 April. I have a couch.


pbjosh


Mar 31, 2003, 8:25 AM
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Lox unless you want to repeat Stingray (13d overhung tips @ jtree) you have no place to talk vs. Mike :)

josh


bvb


Mar 31, 2003, 8:27 AM
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uh, lox, we were all hoping for something a little, oh, i don't know...funnier. wittier. you know, cheerful banter and one-upmanship. your reputation as a consummate racontuer is gonna take a hit if you can't fire back a post that's so damn funny it makes our abs ache with laughter and we snort beer out our noses. not some ill-tempered, half-baked point-by-point rebuttal of previous posts. this is IMPROV, jackson! get with the program! think robin williams on speed, not ari fleisher on downers!

think man, THINK! you can do it!

btw, i was thinking about moving to centex but bryan gibson and rob guinn talked me out of it so i moved to flagstaff instead. but i still gotta check the texas limestone out. you serious about that couch? can i bring about 16 of my best freinds?


lox


Mar 31, 2003, 8:28 AM
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lol.

But what has he flashed at the Draw ?

That would be a far more telling angle than thin jtree crack.

He sprayed. It doesn't matter how hard he climbs... spraying in and of itself is WEAK.

You spraying FOR HIM is HELLA WEAK.

And guess what... I don't care and it doesn't matter how hard YOU climb either !!! You're WEAK, son.

Now get yourself to the limestone so I can prove it to you. lol.

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