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jt512


Dec 27, 2004, 10:55 AM
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More realistic beginner's FAQ
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Outline of the Real Beginners Frequently Asked Quesitons

1. Harnesses
1.1 What is teh best
1.2 What is teh cheapest
1.3 Can I make my own
1.3.1 Out of old car seatbelts

2. Ropes
1.1 What is teh best
1.2 What is teh cheapest
1.3 Can I use
1.3.1 My Dad's old rope in the garage
1.3.2 One from the hardware store
1.3.2 Closeline
1.3.3 A garden hose

3. Shoes
3.1 What are teh best
3.2 What are teh cheapest
3.3 Do they really help
3.3.1 No they don't
3.4 Spires
3.4.1 Are they any good or just junk
3.4.2 How many own them

4. Quickdraws
4.1 What are teh best
4.2 What are teh cheapest
4.3 Can I make my own
4.3.1 Out of webbing
4.3.2 Using wraps of string
4.4 Which should I buy
4.4.1 They're all the same; the cheapest
4.5 Orientation
4.5.1 Which way should I face...
4.5.1.1 The biners on my draws
4.5.1.2 The draws on the...
4.5.1.2.1 Bolt
4.5.1.2.2 Gear loops on my harness

5. Rappelling
5.1 How to...
5.1.1 Spell
5.1.2 Do
5.1.2.1 By just reading posts on the internet without any training

6. TR anchors
6.1 Is an oak tree redundant
6.2 How to build
6.2.1 By just reading posts on the internet without any training

7. Everybody on the internet said I was a n00b and I should read a book or get some training
7.1 What book should I read
7.1.1 MFOTH
7.1.1.1 Is it any good
7.2 I've never bought a book before; where do you get them

8. Belaying
8.1 Palms up or palms down
8.2 Belay devices
8.2.1 What is teh best
8.2.1 ATC all the way
8.2.1 Reverso or ATC-XP [1]
8.2.2 I love my...
8.2.2.1 Reverso
8.2.2.2 ATC-XP
8.3 Grigris
8.3.1 Suck
8.3.2 Rool
8.3.3 Are foolproof
8.3.4 Are not foolproof
8.3.5 Fail
8.3.5.1 The grigri failed
8.3.5.1.1 And I was dropped by my
8.3.5.1.1.1 Partner
8.3.5.1.1.2 Wife
8.3.5.1.1.3 Girlfriend
8.3.5.1.1.3.1 How do I get her to climb with me again
8.3.5.1.2 And I dropped my partner
8.3.5.1.2.1 And I swear I was holding the brake side of the rope
8.3.5.1.2.1.1 Even the witnesses said so

Please feel free to make any additions you can think of. All of the above have actually been asked/discussed. What would be a riot would be to actually link the posts to the "FAQ."

-Jay


curt


Dec 27, 2004, 11:06 AM
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8.2.2.3 Foot
8.2.2.3.1 Works
8.2.2.3.2 Can't possibly work
8.2.2.3.3 Is stupid
8.2.2.3.4 Is not stupid

Curt


dirtineye


Dec 27, 2004, 11:19 AM
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Proof that jt512 has a serious sense of humor.

That was too funny.


Partner j_ung


Dec 27, 2004, 11:31 AM
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He's here through the weekend, ladies and germs. Try the veal; it's delicious!


curt


Dec 27, 2004, 11:39 AM
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4.5.2 Backclipping
4.5.2.1 Is bad
4.5.2.1.1 You will die
4.5.2.1.2 You might die
4.5.2.2 Isn't that bad
4.5.2.2.1 You might die
4.5.2.2.2 You might not die
4.5.2.3 What is backclipping?

Curt


clausti


Dec 27, 2004, 2:29 PM
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7.3 Should I listen to jt512? He's
7.3.1 Such an asshole.
7.3.2 A wonderful, knowledgeable person.
7.3.3 The author of the funniest posts I've ever read.


slablizard


Dec 27, 2004, 3:09 PM
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9. Knots:
9.1 Figure 8
9.2 Figure skating
9.3 Go figure.
9.4 Bowline
9.5 Double Bowline
9.6 Double bowline doubled
9.7 Velcro straps?
9.8 Solo?
9.9 can I clip into my chalk belt?
9.10 can I clip into my pants?


Partner climbinginchico


Dec 27, 2004, 3:37 PM
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10. Trad Climbing
10.1 What is trad climbing?
10.1.1 Trad is better than sport
10.1.2 Trad is for people who can't sport
10.1.3 Trad is practice for aid
10.1.4 Trad is for those who can't boulder
10.2 What is pro?
10.2.1 What are nuts?
10.2.1.1 Do I have any?
10.2.1.1.1 How do I check?
10.2.1.2 What are the best stoppers?
10.2.1.2.1 Can I use old hardware store nuts?
10.2.1.2.2 Slung with shoelaces?
10.2.2. What are cams?
10.2.2.1 How do they work?
10.2.2.1.1 Magic
10.2.2.2 What are the best cams?
10.2.2.2.1 Camalots
10.2.2.2.1.1 No they aren't they are heavy and expensive
10.2.2.2.1.2 Yes they are they have better range and I like the confidence
10.2.2.2.2 Tech Friends
10.2.2.2.3 Metolius
10.2.2.2.4 Trango
10.2.2.2.5 DMM
10.2.2.2.6 Rock Empire
10.2.2.2.6.1 They suck they are too cheap
10.2.2.2.6.2 They rool cuz they are cheap
10.2.2.2.7 Who cares use what you like.
10.2.3 What is a trad draw?
10.2.3.1 Can I make my own?
10.2.3.1.1 With tied webbing?
10.2.3.1.2 With shoelaces?
10.2.4 How do I rack pro?
10.2.4.1 On wiregates
10.2.4.1.1 No, your nuts will fall off if you use wiregates.
10.2.4.1.2 No they won't. I still have all my nuts.
10.2.4.2 One biner per cam?
10.2.4.2.1 You can use multiple cams per biner.
10.2.4.2.1.1 No you shouldn't
10.2.4.2.1.2 I do and I like it so STFU N00B
10.2.4.3 Gates in or out?
10.2.4.3.1 In
10.2.4.3.2 Out
10.2.4.3.3 Who cares?
10.2.4.3.4 What are gates?
10.2.4 What are tricams?
10.2.4.1 I Hate tricams they are hard to place and clean
10.2.4.1.1 No they aren't
10.2.4.1.2 Yes they are
10.2.5 Big Bro's
10.2.5.1 Do I need Big Bro's?
10.2.5.1.1 If you need big pro.
10.2.5.1.2 No you don't they are too hard to place.
10.2.5.1.3 Yes you do. They are only hard if you're a dumbass n00b. STFU
10.2.6 Rack size
10.2.6.1 Is bigger better?
10.2.6.1.1 Yes.
10.2.6.1.2 No it's too heavy.
10.2.6.2 I love Kate's rack
10.2.6.2.1 Yeah, that lovely rack turns me on.
10.2.6.2.2 No, it's too big.
10.2.6.2.3 It's too small for me; I love a huge rack.


clausti


Dec 27, 2004, 3:44 PM
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In reply to:
10.2.2. What are cams?
10.2.2.1 How do they work?
10.2.2.1.1 Magic.


jesus christ is that hilarious... score for you.


johnson6102002


Dec 27, 2004, 4:26 PM
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quite possibly the funniest thread i have ever read thank you!


climbsomething


Dec 27, 2004, 5:00 PM
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In reply to:
7.3 Should I listen to jt512? He's
7.3.1 Such an asshole.
7.3.2 A wonderful, knowledgeable person.
7.3.3 The author of the funniest posts I've ever read.

:roll:

(I think)


jpearl


Dec 27, 2004, 9:35 PM
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11.1 What shoes do you reccomend?
11.2 What shoes do U reccomend?
11.3 What shoos do U reccomend?
11.4 What shooz do U rekomend?


cantbuymefriends


Dec 28, 2004, 1:58 AM
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In reply to:
4.5.2 Backclipping
4.5.2.1 Is bad
4.5.2.1.1 You will die
4.5.2.1.2 You might die
4.5.2.2 Isn't that bad
4.5.2.2.1 You might die
4.5.2.2.2 You might not die
4.5.2.3 What is backclipping?

Curt

4.5.2.3.1 Same as Z-clipping
4.5.2.3.2 Is not!


Partner climbinginchico


Dec 28, 2004, 5:15 PM
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Kate, could you grace us with an aid FAQ please? :D


Partner tattooed_climber


Dec 28, 2004, 5:31 PM
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bahahahahhahahahahhahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so fucking funny that i just forgot i had to just wipe out my main harddrive to rid myself of a Worm (and lost EVERYTHING!, 100s of pics, 1000's of mp3, docs, etc)


:righton:


timstich


Dec 31, 2004, 10:33 PM
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14.1.1 Why do you...
14.1.2 trad climb?
14.1.3 sport climb?
14.2.1 drink and climb?
14.3.1 breath air?
14.5.2 hold that gun on me?
14.6.3 point that at your head?
14.10.1 hello?


Partner epoch
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May 13, 2008, 11:52 AM
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See what happens when you dig deep enough?


Partner macherry


May 13, 2008, 11:56 AM
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nice find


overlord


May 13, 2008, 12:30 PM
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wow, you really did have to dig deep for this little gem Cool


dr_feelgood


May 13, 2008, 2:04 PM
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Did someone just search RichardVG03's post history?


Partner philbox
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May 13, 2008, 8:37 PM
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Oh this gem simply has to be linked to the FAQ, that is if someone hasn't already done so.


stymingersfink


May 13, 2008, 8:56 PM
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philbox wrote:
Oh this gem simply has to be linked to the FAQ, that is if someone hasn't already done so.
this is correct.


dingus


May 14, 2008, 8:25 AM
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20. I just bought (x)
20.1 Is it any good?
20.2 It is shit
20.3 No it isn't.
20.4 You need more.
20..5 You need less
20.6 Gear is for old men.
20.7 Cruxes and topouts baby!

DMT


billcoe_


Apr 16, 2010, 4:46 AM
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OMG! How did I miss this classic first go round?

Thanks JT!


bill413


Apr 16, 2010, 6:35 AM
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Because who reads faq's?


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