To Climb, To Live

I sit, frustrated, and wonder why
So few have courage enough--
And a hunger sustained--
To splurge, absolutely, on life.

Most spend it by the penny:
Breaths expelled irretrievably,
Heartbeats wasted, measuring time
In increments of lost opportunity.

Tied to a job, anchored to a home,
Committed to those we love.
Fulfilling our responsibilities,
While life bleeds slowly away.

When my days are filled with rain
And clouds turn blue to gray,
I long for escape to another place
Where sun-bleached stone awaits each day.

Exploring self through bold exertion--
Facing fear and testing limits.
To climb, ascend, and reach the top.
I am alive! I am fulfilled.

Internal struggle; my mind's tormented.
To work and then die?
Or to climb and have lived?
Some do, some don't, some will, some won't.

A sign, I swear, is all I need
To show the way for me.
For if I wait (I've now turned fifty),
I will be too old. It will be too late.

When my days are filled with rain
And clouds turn blue to gray,
I long for escape to another place
Where sun-bleached stone awaits each day.