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wonderwoman


Jul 16, 2009, 2:08 AM
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So far this climbing season I have...
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Okay, I know that some of you folks are fortunate and smart enough to live in places where there there is year round climbing! However, some of us only have a (very wet) few months to get our time on the rock.

With all this rain, I have not yet met my climbing goals this season. But I have had some excitement! The purpose of this thread is to (amuse and inspire me, and) share your crazy, funny, recent stories. Here are some of mine!

So far this climbing season I have:

1. Nearly climbed to the end of my rope! In April, we took a trip to Red Rocks and one of the first climbs we did was Solar Slab. I was leading the first pitch & using my friend's doubles. I used one rope for the one or two pieces that I managed to get in the lower slabby part, and reserved the other rope for the crack on the upper part of the climb.

As I neared the anchor, I was getting a ton of rope drag due to the long slabby section. My partner calls up 'Um, how close to the anchor are you?!'.

As I clove hitch and before I can even begin to start pulling up any of the rope, I hear 'that's me!’ from my partner below. The crack rope had been completely used up, while the slab rope still had several feet of slack in it!

Immediately after our rappel, we decide to bring the short rope to the gear shop to get it measured. This rope, which has never been trimmed, comes up 13 feet short and my friend ends up having to buy a second rope to use for the rest of our trip!

2. While on lead, had a snake hiss in my face! As I pulled my face up to a grassy Gunks horizontal on Hans Puss, something within very close proximity to my nose made the loudest hissing noise that I have ever heard! I'm not sure if it was a black snake or copperhead, but damn, did that thing move fast! I screamed as I down climbed a few moves and looked up to see the grass and leaves move in a way that indicated the creature had made a getaway further into the corner of the horizontal. After letting my heart rate slow a little bit, I proceeded upwards while giving a very wide berth to that hissing corner.

3. Been nearly strangled by my helmet straps! After finishing up Directissima in the Gunks, the clouds open up and it started to rain. Wanting to get down as quick as possible, Josh and I thought it best to simul-rappel down the High E rap station. We extended our rap devices to increase friction you get from using a single strand and / or a thin rope and made sure to back up our rappels.

The High E rap has two big ledges, so you wind up rapping to a ledge and then lowering your rope twice. On the second ledge, Josh and I take off to continue our rappel to the ground. By now, the ropes are drenched with water super stretchy and wringing themselves out as they go though the rap device.

Josh and I take off from the ledge, and between him weighing more than I do, the rope being super springy, our rap devices being extended, Josh ends up being a little lower than me as soon as he weights the rope. This springy-ness sends me backward with a little bounce as I take off, and the back of my helmet somehow lands on top of his belay device and is hung up there.

I am now suspended in the air by my helmet being stuck on his belay device, and I’m gasping for air.

First thought: Don't let go of the brake hand. I’m backed up, but letting go will lower me more and I know my helmet is stuck on something.

Second thought: Get this helmet off. Only I can't manage to undo the clasp that is now digging in under my jaw.

Third thought: I'm hung up on a tree branch. I'm reaching behind my head to do a one armed pull up on an imaginary tree branch to get my weight off my helmet. There is no such tree branch.

Fourth thought: Get the f**k back on that rock! NOW!

I'm stuck, still suspended in air and gasping for breath, trying to propel myself back to something solid. As I do this, I feel an upward shove on the my back of my helmet and I am released, back onto the rock and coughing. My eyes are watering and throat is burning. My tongue feels too big for my mouth.

I could not have been stuck for more than a few seconds, but man, it seemed like an eternity! I’m shaken up and have helmet straps imprinted under my chin for the rest of the weekend. All the while, my hand never left the brake.



A few hours later I say to Josh: ‘Um, couldn’t you just have lowered yourself and that would have gotten your rap device unstuck from my helmet and released me?’.

Him: ‘Oh yeah…. I guess that would have worked!’.

I’m wondering if there’s an insurance policy out on me… Hmmm….

4. Discovered that yes, you do need two ropes to rap down Childrens Crusade in North Conway! Josh and I had officially retired our doubles the week before and were waiting for our shipment of new ones to come in. In the meantime, we had a week lined up to climb in North Conway where you can normally walk off or rap with one rope.

Before leaving the ground we discussed our options of finding the walk off or rapping off. We decided that in the event that one rope would not make it, one rope would at the very least make it to the bolted sections where we could leave some bail biners and make it safely down to the ground. We had a plan. When we topped out we discussed our options again. For some reason, we chose to rap down.

This worked well until the second to last pitch where Josh built himself an anchor and took himself off rappel because we were probably 5 feet shy of the next rap station! I rap past Josh, thinking that I might be able to just reach it. I have 2 girth hitched slings attached to my belay loop and I’m trying some serious Cirque de Solei moves to lock myself into that damn anchor!

It’s no use! We decide that Josh weighs more, and correctly assume that the rope might stretch just enough for him to make it to the station. Our other option is to prussik back up to some nearby bolts and get out those bail biners!

Josh does make it, and now it’s my turn to try again. I attach 2 prussiks above my rappel device to REALLY back things up and make my way down. Josh is able to grab my girth hitched slings and anchors me into the station. However, I still have to get to the station and at risk of taking a very static fall onto the slings and by now, my temper has run out.

The only solution at this point is to use Josh as a human foot hold or file for divorce!

Our marriage survived and so did we!

5. Lots of lead falls, and one screaming epic. I took a dozen whippers on Connecticutt Cracks in Acadia National Park and finally gave up after my knuckles looked as if they had gone through a cheese grater. I fell on the low crux of Absurdland in the Gunks, where last year I had to take and hang. I fell on my first piece on Look Out Crack in North Conway (which is little more than a glorified high ball boulder problem, but fun anyway). And I somehow managed to pull the roof on Modern Times in the Gunks only to find myself screaming and wedged in a horizontal, ascared of taking the biggest whipper of my life. Once I realized I was too stuck to fall out, I plugged a piece in but didn’t have enough umph left in me to finish the final traverse and had to be lowered. After a long, long time up there, I shamefully bailed. Now I have a project, I suppose!

So now I need some inspiration and funny stories from you guys! The weather has been so crappy here, and I haven’t managed out half as much as I had hoped! If I’m falling, I guess that means that I am climbing at my limit, which is good. My limit, however, seems lower than it was last season, which is disappointing.

Please inspire me! Make me laugh! Share your craziness! It looks like it will rain everywhere in the North East again this weekend, and I don't think I can take it anymore!


(This post was edited by wonderwoman on Jul 16, 2009, 3:21 AM)


moose_droppings


Jul 16, 2009, 2:50 AM
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Earlier this spring I took my two grand nephews out as I had promised them at Christmas for their first time out climbing (12 & 14). I rope soloed a rock I done before, an easy 5.6 or so well off the beaten path, to set up a top rope for them to cut their teeth on. The top was about 8' wide by 20' long, and as soon as I grabbed the top jug I heard a very loud hiss. Well, nothing had bit me yet and my curiosity was peaked so I pulled over the top to see what was so pissed at me. I nearly broke my jaw as it dropped and I saw a large, mad goose coming at me, she was defending her nest with eggs. Freaked me out. She wasn't going to allow me to set up an anchor there, so I down climbed, cleaning as I went, and we were soon off to another spot.

I've pulled over ledges to find mountain goats and bighorn sheep before, but a damn goose?


clmbr


Jul 16, 2009, 2:51 AM
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Sounds like your weather is tha same as ours.
The last 4 full weekend trips have been whittled down to 2 short bursts to beat the rain. Better to get 4 climbs and a 2 hour drive than an all dayer wondering if we should've gone.
To keep inspired...hmmm..reruns on comedy central, buying gear I don't need, home wall climbing and trying to get past dangerous mammals to get to the beach.)
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wonderwoman


Jul 16, 2009, 3:14 AM
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I would, indeed, be very startled by the appearance of a goose or a baby seal out here! You guys may have me beat!


Partner happiegrrrl


Jul 16, 2009, 3:29 AM
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Weekend before last, climbing with a partner du jour, included a day of epics to the point I was worried I'd read about it through a bystander's perspective here on rc....

At one point, we had gotten back to the ground and I was sorting gear as my partner went over to grab a bite to eat.

Teddy had been tied up and, as is usual, I untied him and he came over with me as I did the gear. A few minutes later I went over to where my partner was, and grabbed gulp of water and went to put on my Crocs.

Suddenly, the partner exclaims "Where the hell is my sandwich!?"


Uh Oh.......

I looked at Teddy. He looked at me. We both looked at the sandwich paper, laying empty on the ground near the partner.


I SWEAR Teddy was with me the whole time, and the guy did say later on that maybe he just didn't remember eating the second half of his sandwich(It's possible; it HAD been that kind of a day....)

So I defend Teddy, with profuse apologies *in case* and offers of every food item in my pack.

We're just about fully agreed that Teddy is innocent (and really, I do believe he was - there's just no way a sandwich could have disappeared with no bread bits left had he eaten it) when the partner says "Well - if he HAD had a chance, would he have eaten it?"





hmmm...."How to answer..." I wonder.


Pause.


"Well...ummm, yeah. Of course he would have eaten a sandwich laying on the ground if he had a chance."


climbingtrash


Jul 16, 2009, 4:10 AM
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I just ate an ice cream sammich!


sungam


Jul 16, 2009, 4:52 AM
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climbingtrash wrote:
I just ate an ice cream sammich!
Holy shit I'm so jealous!
Wait a second, 7/11 is still open!
Back in 15.


clmbr


Jul 16, 2009, 5:13 AM
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Happie girl..thats just too funny. especially the looks at each other. A little while ago there was a birthday party going on at the crag and while everyone was ripping the beers open, the kind friend who baked the chocolate birthday cake went to the back of the car to get it and the whole thing had been eaten by the fat labrador. Caught licking the plate he didn't even bother denying it.

Moose, that goose musta given you nightmares for a while comin at you like that.


charley


Jul 16, 2009, 12:02 PM
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I live in western pa. and we have been getting plenty of rain also. In addition to that we are having a modular home put on a basement on the lot next to our current house. This has kept me busy and unable to go anywhere but the few places a cpl hours from me. It seems I always need to contact someone or get something done. The basement is up, the floor will be poured next week and the house will be set on the 29th. I think I will still be busy for a month after that but an end is in sight. My climbing has not been scary or funny. Then I can't remember yesterday so it may have been. My climbing has been weak and I can't remember the last time I was on the sharp end.
WW it sounds like you have still had a fun season.


coolcat83


Jul 16, 2009, 12:45 PM
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So far this climbing season I have:

1. Been rained out much more than I'd like.

2. Been sized up by a Big rat snake. I was climbing with some friends in Peter's kill, which is up by the gunks, lead up Cornflake for a warmup and to get my lead head in order after not being able to climb outside on gear for a few weeks due to the rain. got to the top to set the anchor, one cam in, tricam in, then i eyed a nice little nut placement, slot the nut in, and this large black snake head pokes out beside the wires, my immediate thought was huh that's odd, followed by, shit!, once I realized it was a rat snake (not poisonous) I got my head about me, wiggled the nut and he retreated. Brought up my second, but for some reason every time a branch or something moved in my peripheral vision, my brain went SNAKE!

3. Relaxed on a belay ledge eating wild blueberries. While not a harrowing story definitely one of the most relaxing highlights of my season so far. Was in the Trapps with a new leader, her 3rd lead to be exact. She lead up Easy V to the GT ledge and there 90 feet up were lots of blueberry bushes, so with clear blue skies and great exposure we snacked and talked trad.

4. Learned to always read the guidebook myself. I went with a small group to Allamuchy state park in NJ to do some top roping, there's a main wall with routes capped by some easy 5th class for a little more than 30m to the top (I later learned). There's a 4th class scramble I usually take that leads to the ledge to set up ropes instead of having to rap the 30ish meters down. It was just after it rained and the scramble was really slick, so me and the other guy I was with (who never climbed there before at all) decided that we'd go to the top and rap, since the according to the book a rope will do it. Well I started rapping down off a big tree at the top, it's slabby 5th class so I couldn't see the ledge till I went over a bulge about 20 feet from the ledge, and there I see it, my backup knots dangling about 8 feet below me. I was wishfully thinking, ok, with rope stretch I could make it, when it became apparent that that wasn't going to happen , I aimed for a crack about 10 feet up from the ledge and made myself an anchor. Now this whole time I'm trying to yell to the guy at the top and inform him of the situation but apparently he couldn't hear me. So I wound up setting the anchor, and then downclimbing/lowering off my intermediate anchor, putting in a couple pieces on the way down and then once set lower, went up the 10 feet to clean the anchor above... What a mini epic for a tr setup. Got the tr setup and rapped to the bottom of the main wall (could see the ends down this time). Confused I hiked up around the top to my confused friend, and told him the situation. Apparently he had figured the distance from the route descriptions (which are around 60 feet) and not the total height (which was given elsewhere). From now on I'm reading the book myself!


wonderwoman


Jul 16, 2009, 1:42 PM
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climbingtrash wrote:
I just ate an ice cream sammich!

I've skipped on the ice cream this season in favor of beer.


coolcat83


Jul 16, 2009, 2:34 PM
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wonderwoman wrote:
climbingtrash wrote:
I just ate an ice cream sammich!

I've skipped on the ice cream this season in favor of beer.

Trad whippers and beer, your husband is a lucky man.


sungam


Jul 16, 2009, 3:44 PM
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Quick recap...
Dropped to t3h deckz by Angry (he caught me just as I touched down, but my knees still hurt for a week)

Caught out in weather and unpreparedness on Stairway to Heaven and took almost thrice as long as we planned. Mountain Rescue was called, but we got back just before they headed out to save us.

Thrown out of the Pussycat Dolls club in Vegas.

Hiked through knee deep snow to boulder on my birthday (priest draw in flagstaff), and then we skidded off the road and it took us like an hour to get out, and it almost rolled (which would have sucked).

Dan dropped one of my carbon fibre axes into the river at Ouray, but Cory managed to rescue it. He then tried to solo out and fell. Breaking through the ice and into the river broke the impact, and he was fine - but GAWD was it funny!

River tower.

many night climbz in Moab.

Some chick was climbing on wallstreet with slack in the toprope and fell, and her foot got stuck in a crack. Clueless partners so I climbed up and "rescued" her. She kissed me and asked me if I would marry her. I told her "we'll see".

Several occasions of mistaken rap length with Kenny.

Busted by cops for drinking but talked my way out of a ticket.

Ate at a restaurant with my sister that had a bikini clad drag queen dancing around.


bill413


Jul 16, 2009, 10:16 PM
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sungam wrote:
ome chick was climbing on wallstreet with slack in the toprope and fell, and her foot got stuck in a crack. Clueless partners so I climbed up and "rescued" her. She kissed me and asked me if I would marry her. I told her "we'll see".

Your in Utah - marrying her shouldn't cramp your style.


sungam


Jul 16, 2009, 10:31 PM
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bill413 wrote:
sungam wrote:
ome chick was climbing on wallstreet with slack in the toprope and fell, and her foot got stuck in a crack. Clueless partners so I climbed up and "rescued" her. She kissed me and asked me if I would marry her. I told her "we'll see".

Your in Utah - marrying her shouldn't cramp your style.
She was too old for a Utahn marriage - she was fully physically and mentally developed.


blueeyedclimber


Jul 16, 2009, 10:34 PM
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coolcat83 wrote:
wonderwoman wrote:
climbingtrash wrote:
I just ate an ice cream sammich!

I've skipped on the ice cream this season in favor of beer.

Trad whippers and beer, your husband is a lucky man.

In more ways then one ! Wink


blueeyedclimber


Jul 16, 2009, 10:43 PM
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Let's see....So far this year, I have...

1. Done my longest climb ever (11 hours) only to be followed by my longest descent ever (5 1/2 hours) because we got lost. We ran out of food and water and were greeted at the bottom around midnight by my loving wife and her friend with more food and water then we could possibly use.

2. Almost strangled my wife with my belay device. It was an accident, I swear! Angelic

3. been humbled by a mere 5.10c only to find out later that rockfall had made it more like 5.11c.

4. Opted to run it out rather then protect a crack in which a hornet was building a nest. Hey, he was there first!

As far as goals go, I've met a couple, but it's hard to get in a rhythm with all this damn rain! PirateCrazyMad

Josh


climbingtrash


Jul 17, 2009, 1:00 AM
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sungam wrote:
Quick recap...
Dropped to t3h deckz by Angry (he caught me just as I touched down, but my knees still hurt for a week)

Caught out in weather and unpreparedness on Stairway to Heaven and took almost thrice as long as we planned. Mountain Rescue was called, but we got back just before they headed out to save us.

Thrown out of the Pussycat Dolls club in Vegas.

Hiked through knee deep snow to boulder on my birthday (priest draw in flagstaff), and then we skidded off the road and it took us like an hour to get out, and it almost rolled (which would have sucked).

Dan dropped one of my carbon fibre axes into the river at Ouray, but Cory managed to rescue it. He then tried to solo out and fell. Breaking through the ice and into the river broke the impact, and he was fine - but GAWD was it funny!

River tower.

many night climbz in Moab.

Some chick was climbing on wallstreet with slack in the toprope and fell, and her foot got stuck in a crack. Clueless partners so I climbed up and "rescued" her. She kissed me and asked me if I would marry her. I told her "we'll see".

Several occasions of mistaken rap length with Kenny.

Busted by cops for drinking but talked my way out of a ticket.

Ate at a restaurant with my sister that had a bikini clad drag queen dancing around.

You forgot -FAILED to comez to Zion and git scared shitlles on some fine desert choss. That and you could have made a quick trip up to Colorado City (polygamy town, only 22miles from Zion) to troll fer Chickz.


sungam


Jul 17, 2009, 1:12 AM
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climbingtrash wrote:
sungam wrote:
Quick recap...
Dropped to t3h deckz by Angry (he caught me just as I touched down, but my knees still hurt for a week)

Caught out in weather and unpreparedness on Stairway to Heaven and took almost thrice as long as we planned. Mountain Rescue was called, but we got back just before they headed out to save us.

Thrown out of the Pussycat Dolls club in Vegas.

Hiked through knee deep snow to boulder on my birthday (priest draw in flagstaff), and then we skidded off the road and it took us like an hour to get out, and it almost rolled (which would have sucked).

Dan dropped one of my carbon fibre axes into the river at Ouray, but Cory managed to rescue it. He then tried to solo out and fell. Breaking through the ice and into the river broke the impact, and he was fine - but GAWD was it funny!

River tower.

many night climbz in Moab.

Some chick was climbing on wallstreet with slack in the toprope and fell, and her foot got stuck in a crack. Clueless partners so I climbed up and "rescued" her. She kissed me and asked me if I would marry her. I told her "we'll see".

Several occasions of mistaken rap length with Kenny.

Busted by cops for drinking but talked my way out of a ticket.

Ate at a restaurant with my sister that had a bikini clad drag queen dancing around.

You forgot -FAILED to comez to Zion and git scared shitlles on some fine desert choss. That and you could have made a quick trip up to Colorado City (polygamy town, only 22miles from Zion) to troll fer Chickz.
I DESPERATELY wanted to go to Zion, but I couldn't manage to organize shit, since I'm still a n00b at dirtbagging.


wonderwoman


Jul 17, 2009, 3:21 AM
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blueeyedclimber wrote:
1. Done my longest climb ever (11 hours) only to be followed by my longest descent ever (5 1/2 hours) because we got lost. We ran out of food and water and were greeted at the bottom around midnight by my loving wife and her friend with more food and water then we could possibly use.

I was telling my friend that story tonight! About me getting directions from vegastradguy so that I could find the parking lot in hopes you would see the headlights. And how it worked!

'Hello, vegastradguy, um, you don't know me and I know it's late at night... but.... could you please tell me how to get to the Black Velvet Canyon road?'

I am incredibly thankful for his help!


sungam


Jul 17, 2009, 3:50 AM
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wonderwoman wrote:
'Hello, vegastradguy, um, you don't know me and I know it's late at night... but.... could you please tell me how to get to the Black Velvet Canyon road?'
roflcaykez. rc.com is such a strong community.


climbingtrash


Jul 18, 2009, 3:26 AM
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Registered: Jan 19, 2006
Posts: 5114

Re: [sungam] So far this climbing season I have... [In reply to]
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sungam wrote:
climbingtrash wrote:
sungam wrote:
Quick recap...
Dropped to t3h deckz by Angry (he caught me just as I touched down, but my knees still hurt for a week)

Caught out in weather and unpreparedness on Stairway to Heaven and took almost thrice as long as we planned. Mountain Rescue was called, but we got back just before they headed out to save us.

Thrown out of the Pussycat Dolls club in Vegas.

Hiked through knee deep snow to boulder on my birthday (priest draw in flagstaff), and then we skidded off the road and it took us like an hour to get out, and it almost rolled (which would have sucked).

Dan dropped one of my carbon fibre axes into the river at Ouray, but Cory managed to rescue it. He then tried to solo out and fell. Breaking through the ice and into the river broke the impact, and he was fine - but GAWD was it funny!

River tower.

many night climbz in Moab.

Some chick was climbing on wallstreet with slack in the toprope and fell, and her foot got stuck in a crack. Clueless partners so I climbed up and "rescued" her. She kissed me and asked me if I would marry her. I told her "we'll see".

Several occasions of mistaken rap length with Kenny.

Busted by cops for drinking but talked my way out of a ticket.

Ate at a restaurant with my sister that had a bikini clad drag queen dancing around.

You forgot -FAILED to comez to Zion and git scared shitlles on some fine desert choss. That and you could have made a quick trip up to Colorado City (polygamy town, only 22miles from Zion) to troll fer Chickz.
I DESPERATELY wanted to go to Zion, but I couldn't manage to organize shit, since I'm still a n00b at dirtbagging.

Dis iz k0rrect! Maybe you git it right next time around.


vegastradguy


Jul 18, 2009, 4:01 AM
Post #23 of 35 (5858 views)
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Registered: Aug 28, 2002
Posts: 5919

Re: [climbingtrash] So far this climbing season I have... [In reply to]
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this season has just been bizarre for me. probably climbed less than i have since i first started climbing and couldnt manage to get regular partners, BUT what i have climbed has either been big, significant routes like the OR of the Rainbow Wall or Adventure Punks or milestone climbs for me like getting up several .12a's (on TR, and nearly redpointing my first .12a on lead).

overall, kind of a turd season, but at least when i have been getting out, its been pretty memorable.


billl7


Jul 18, 2009, 4:13 AM
Post #24 of 35 (5851 views)
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Registered: Oct 13, 2005
Posts: 1890

Re: [wonderwoman] So far this climbing season I have... [In reply to]
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A mildly off-topic list ...

Watched a 70+ year old do his first onsight traditional lead. He wanted pictues as he has a lot of friends skeptical about his new-found addicton.

Heard a report from a friend at a single-pitch sport crag that a top-roper pulled off a rock which narrowly missed the belayer and another person below ... but amputated 2 to 3 inches from a dogs tail. After minor on-site surgery to remove a stray tendon, the dog may not have to have any surgery by professionals.

While leading P1 of a climb, heard my belayer below yelp. Mr Bear had walked around a corner and they noticed each other when there was about 7 feet of air between them. Mr. Bear stood up on his hind legs, turned sideways, then back onto all fours, and ambled away. My belayer later said it was about then that he got his courage up enough to say "Hay, get out-a-here!"

Climbed in the rain for the first time - no smearing!!

Ran out of gas on the way to a climb. Asked a stranger unloading his mountain bike from his truck if he had a container with gas. He ended up loaning us his truck so we could make the 1/2 hour drive for gas while he went on his 2 hour trail ride. We topped off his tank for him.

All of the above happened on the same day three or four weeks ago.

Bill


(This post was edited by billl7 on Jul 18, 2009, 4:16 AM)


mushroom


Jul 18, 2009, 5:21 AM
Post #25 of 35 (5828 views)
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Registered: Mar 10, 2007
Posts: 230

Re: [wonderwoman] So far this climbing season I have... [In reply to]
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So fat this climbing season I have...

1. Climbed 5x 14ers (T-bolt to Mt. Sill, Sierras)

2. Climbed El Cap (East Buttress)

3. Spent the night on a wall (Dinner Ledge, WaCo)

4. Taken 4 trad falls.

5. Got drunken enough in Camp 4 to wind up sleeping in stall #3.


(This post was edited by mushroom on Jul 18, 2009, 5:22 AM)

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