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JackAttack
Jan 24, 2008, 12:33 AM
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Lets all post up our favorite climbing/outdoors related jokes, or just any jokes that are mildly appropriate. I figured it would be tough to start an argument on a thread like this, and it seems like almost all the recent threads have at least one argument. Lets try to keep this one light-hearted. Here's my favorite:
"Hiking is just walking where its okay to pee. Sometimes old people hike by mistake."
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Arrogant_Bastard
Jan 24, 2008, 12:36 AM
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Registered: Oct 31, 2007
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Knock Knock
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JackAttack
Jan 24, 2008, 12:44 AM
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Arrogant_Bastard wrote: Knock Knock
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kachoong
Jan 24, 2008, 4:02 AM
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Registered: Jan 23, 2004
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JackAttack wrote: Arrogant_Bastard wrote: Knock Knock who's there?
Damn kids!
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AZBones
Jan 24, 2008, 3:20 PM
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A baby seal walks into a club....
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Carnage
Jan 26, 2008, 8:57 AM
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Registered: Mar 27, 2007
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AZBones wrote: A baby seal walks into a club....
and an intuit finds a way to make a quick buck?
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notapplicable
Jan 26, 2008, 10:33 PM
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How are nearsighted Gynocologysts like dogs?
They both have wet noses.
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clausti
Jan 26, 2008, 11:38 PM
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Registered: Oct 5, 2004
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notapplicable wrote: How are nearsighted Gynocologysts like dogs? They both have wet noses.
how is a nearsighted proctologist like a dog?
they both have brown, wet noses.
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clausti
Jan 27, 2008, 6:24 PM
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notapplicable wrote: clausti wrote: ...brown, wet noses.  That joke took an unfortunate turn...
haha, see i thought it was unfortunate from the beginning.
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notapplicable
Jan 28, 2008, 1:28 AM
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clausti wrote: notapplicable wrote: clausti wrote: ...brown, wet noses. That joke took an unfortunate turn... haha, see i thought it was unfortunate from the beginning.
Touche.
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AZBones
Jan 28, 2008, 6:14 PM
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What's the difference between a brown noser and a shithead?
Depth perception
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j_ung
Jan 28, 2008, 6:30 PM
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Registered: Nov 21, 2003
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What is Beethoven doing right now?
DEcomposing.
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krillen
Jan 28, 2008, 6:44 PM
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Carnage wrote: AZBones wrote: A baby seal walks into a club.... and an intuit finds a way to make a quick buck?
Is that anything like an "Inuit"? He could be into it....you'd have to ask him?
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hiyapokey
Jan 28, 2008, 9:40 PM
Post #15 of 20
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Registered: Jul 6, 2006
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A woman walks into the doctor's office with sore breasts. The doctor says, "well, lets numb those up a little."
Num Num Num Num...
Num Num Num Num.
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binrat
Jan 29, 2008, 12:29 AM
Post #16 of 20
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Registered: Jul 27, 2006
Posts: 1155
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How does a bachelor know when his pizza is done cooking??
When the smoke alarm goes off
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c4c
Jan 29, 2008, 9:30 PM
Post #17 of 20
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Registered: Jun 18, 2006
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binrat wrote: How does a bachelor know when his pizza is done cooking?? When the smoke alarm goes off
Thought it was when the doorbell rang?
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grover
Jan 29, 2008, 11:25 PM
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Registered: Dec 17, 2002
Posts: 569
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'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?'
'Yes. What can I do for you?'
'I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith....He's hidin' marijuana inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs, but he's hidin' it there.'
'Thank you very much for the call, sir.'
The next day, the Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept.
Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They sneer at Virgil and leave.
Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house.
'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd....Did the Sheriff come?'
'Yeah!'
'Did they chop your firewood?'
'Yep!'
'Happy Birthday, buddy!'
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notapplicable
Jan 30, 2008, 12:22 AM
Post #19 of 20
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Registered: Aug 31, 2006
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grover wrote: 'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?' 'Yes. What can I do for you?' 'I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith....He's hidin' marijuana inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs, but he's hidin' it there.' 'Thank you very much for the call, sir.' The next day, the Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They sneer at Virgil and leave. Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house. 'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd....Did the Sheriff come?' 'Yeah!' 'Did they chop your firewood?' 'Yep!' 'Happy Birthday, buddy!'
Brilliant!!
I'm typing this with one hand and dialing with the other.
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freeledgeledgy
Feb 14, 2008, 8:29 PM
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Registered: Mar 29, 2006
Posts: 32
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"How can you tell Santa is a climbing bum ?
He's got a beard, always wears the same clothes, and only works one day a year."
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