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roughster
Jul 26, 2004, 10:59 PM
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drink coffee during and after breakfast. It will make sure you drop "da bomb" before you get on the route. Next, drink a can of Ensure for breakfast and pass on solid food. At 250 calories with massive vitamins, its all you need, maybe throw a bannana down if you're still hungry.
Works like a charm!
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carbo
Jul 26, 2004, 11:00 PM
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Coffee works wonders. Take only Imodium AD to "plug it" if you don't want to go for days
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crotch
Jul 26, 2004, 11:13 PM
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I suffer with you; my colon owns me. I've (mostly) tamed the beast with coffee FIRST THING in the morning. Starbucks espresso Double Shots are nice for walls.
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dredsovrn
Jul 26, 2004, 11:18 PM
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As I recall the cheese and crackers that came with MRE's would keep you from snapping one off for days. We used to swear that the army put something in it for that purpose. It's not expensive to find out if it still works.
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uncasid
Jul 26, 2004, 11:45 PM
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MRE's are the only way to go... I swear by em. Don't eat them for more than 10 days though... You will wish you hadn't!!!
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pedro_burrito
Jul 27, 2004, 12:18 AM
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Four Metamucil capsules the evening before. Three aspirin in the morning. I'm blocked for days.
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kman
Jul 27, 2004, 12:21 AM
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The coffee thing gets it out. For me it works a little too well. I will go and then go again. And then the third one always comes knocking at a bad time. I have been trying and trying but can't seem to find the balance. http://instagiber.net/...ntrib/edoom/fart.gif
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seabee
Jul 27, 2004, 12:56 AM
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Yeah, if you're looking to stop the flow entirely, nothing beats an MRE. On a steady diet of 'em, I can go for about four days without having to go non-tactical.
Nothing, believe me, NOTHING is worse than getting shot at mid-poop.
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mother_sheep
Jul 27, 2004, 1:05 AM
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Yeah. MREs are great! Before all that freeze dried stuff came along, I always used to carry them. But when you're trying to pack light, they're a little on the heavy side.
Side note: Plug it or release it. I just want to climb big stuff without having to poo on the route or I want to try something that will release Mr. Poo (sorry, couldn't resist) before I climb.
I feel closer to all of you after having such a deep and personal little chat. hee hee
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dutyje
Jul 27, 2004, 1:33 AM
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I own a little orange plastic shovel called a "Little John". It's got a cap on the handle that holds a little roll of biodegradable toilet paper. My partner used to borrow it and go off into the woods for about 10 minutes after we got to the crag. If you've got a long approach, this may be your best option for achieving "enlightenment" right before your climb.
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petro
Jul 27, 2004, 2:48 PM
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To plug, or to paste... Aye! Therin lies a rub...
To plug. To retain. To save all that was once fare.
Or paste, sweet release. Thine is the salvation from the chains and shackles of the throne.
We all must suffer these slings and arrows. For we are all bound in a brotherhood of slavery to the natural world.
___________
If truly abiding to the code of the alpine ascent. I suggest to go light and fast.
If you abide by seige tactics, you may want to carry around a little extra body mass with all that other dead weight. Being tent-BOUND :shock: , really sucks, but there comes a time in some people's lives where they have to admit that you are not Mark Twight, or Jack Tackle.
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sarcat
Jul 27, 2004, 2:56 PM
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OK petro that's disgusting. .... keep it up.
I've found that when I trave on 2-3 day trips I'll be on the flight home and realize I justt went 2 days without a visit to the throne. Mayby it's the airline food? Or hotelbathroomophobia?
Maybe I could find a flight attendant to pass out a plasic tray at each belay station.
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mother_sheep
Jul 27, 2004, 3:03 PM
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In reply to: To plug, or to paste... Aye! Therin lies a rub... To plug. To retain. To save all that was once fare. Or paste, sweet release. Thine is the salvation from the chains and shackles of the throne. We all must suffer these slings and arrows. For we are all bound in a brotherhood of slavery to the natural world. ___________ If truly abiding to the code of the alpine ascent. I suggest to go light and fast. If you abide by seige tactics, you may want to carry around a little extra body mass with all that other dead weight. Being tent-BOUND :shock: , really sucks, but there comes a time in some people's lives where they have to admit that you are not Mark Twight, or Jack Tackle.
Ahhh poetic poo. But I guess you could have said it with less words by saying, "To poo or not to poo. That is the question." hehe
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viktor
Jul 27, 2004, 3:12 PM
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EAt CHEesE
I must have only done routes that scared me scatless. Plus the patented "Nicotene & Caffeine" diets our docktors put us on saw very little food processing through our gastro-intestinal tracts.
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zozo
Jul 27, 2004, 3:20 PM
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Exlax milk shakes sheep. Recipe on it's way!
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mccarthykm
Jul 27, 2004, 3:24 PM
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If you want to plug it up, try a US military MRE - "meal ready to eat." they aren't too bad depending on what you get. they have plenty of calories to last all day, and i think they add something to keep you from pooping.
However, the gum that is included is a mild laxitive, so don't chew it unless your ready.
I ate them during my brief work as a wildland firefigher with the USFWS. The gov. likes to pay for work not pooping, hence keeping you pluged up.
You can usually purchase them for a small fee at any military surplus store.
Good luck.
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davidji
Jul 27, 2004, 4:03 PM
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In reply to: Is there any food out there that one could eat before a long climb to keep from having to crap on route?
2. The first lead of the day scares the sh!t out of some people (literally). If that applies to you, try to make your first lead be the first pitch off the ground, not the second.
3. While climbing, energy gels avoid the login-logout effect that real food has.
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superdiamonddave
Jul 27, 2004, 4:55 PM
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Yep. Eat an MRE just before you set out on your adventure. Most are a whopping 3000 calories and you won't have to worry about natures call for a long time. Then just pack your lightweight foods for your snacking.
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t-dog
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Jul 27, 2004, 5:31 PM
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hahahah, this thread is awesome, just made my day that much better. Sounds like MRE are the way to go (no pun intended =)
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gunkiemike
Jul 27, 2004, 10:08 PM
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A daily vitamin WITH IRON shuts my lower GI down for 24 hrs. It's the iron that does it - my sis-in-law was on an iron supplement and was incredibly constipated as a result. I even saw the effect in my kids' diapers (literally) when we put 'em on iron-fortified formula.
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pancaketom
Jul 27, 2004, 10:35 PM
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Team Immodium on the wall. but make sure you get a bit past the top out before unloading.
Definitely do what you gotta do before you start up if at all possible. It would be worth waiting a while before starting up rather than getting stuck getting unstuck mid route.
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dredsovrn
Jul 27, 2004, 10:42 PM
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In reply to: To plug, or to paste... Aye! Therin lies a rub... To plug. To retain. To save all that was once fare. Or paste, sweet release. Thine is the salvation from the chains and shackles of the throne. We all must suffer these slings and arrows. For we are all bound in a brotherhood of slavery to the natural world. ___________ .
Very nice. The undiscovered toiletry, from whose bourne no traveller returns.
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atg200
Jul 27, 2004, 10:47 PM
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Registered: Jul 27, 2001
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i drink a big cup of coffee, and that works. if it doesn't, you might consider packing in a newspaper and a stick to bite down on.
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shakylegs
Jul 27, 2004, 10:56 PM
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Not available to US consumers, but I find that over-the-counter Tylenol with codeine keeps everything in its place for quite a while.
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ottoman
Jul 28, 2004, 12:06 AM
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just the thought of climbing is enough to get the bowels to work...other than that ...COFFEE!!!!!
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