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Re: [chadnsc] RC.COM IS ON FACEBOOK:
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thenose
Apr 28, 2010, 10:08 AM
Views: 1949
Registered: Feb 20, 2009
Posts: 47
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chadnsc wrote: F*@CKING NOOB.
hugepedro wrote: I don't know. They worked for THE LAST BASTION, and this guy is claiming he's partnered up with him. Does BRONSON have a protege, or is this just a prank? We may never know.
GOOD QUESTION. YES I AM PARTNERED UP WITH THE ELITE BRONSON. AFTER BURT GOT OVERWHELMED WITH THE EXCESS OF NOOBEY 5.12 SPORT CLIMBERS HE HAD TO FIND A PARTNER TO HELP DIVIDE THE WORK LOAD. FOR A TOTAL OF 13 YEARS BURT TRAINED ME IN THE WAYS OF MANHOOD. THE FIRST FOUR YEARS OF MY TRAINING INVOLVED MOTIVATION TRAINING AT THE BASE OF THE GREAT TRANGO TOWERS. BURT WOULD REGULARLY FLY PENGUINS IN VIA HELICOPTER TO THE TOP OF THE TRANGO TOWERS. IF I WANTED FOOD FOR THE WEEK I WAS FORCED TO FREE SOLO THE TRANGO TOWER BAREFOOT TO GET THE PENGUINS. I THEN WOULD SKIN THEM ALIVE AND BUILD A GLIDER OUT OF THEIR SKIN TO GET BACK DOWN. I HAD TO DO THIS A SUM TOTAL OF 520 TIMES DURING MY TRAINING. THE NEXT FOUR YEARS INVOLVED STRENGTH TRAINING. BURT REQUIRED ME TO ONSIGHT V13 AND HARDER BOULDER PROBLEMS WITH SPIKES IN PLACE OF A CRASH PAD. HE SAID THE SPIKES WHERE THERE AS A CONTINUANCE OF THE MOTIVATION TRAINING TO FORCE ME TO GO FOR THE SEND.
THE NEXT FOUR YEARS INVOLVED ONSIGHTING TRAD IN THE 5.14+ RANGE AND DOING GROUND UP FIRST ACCENTS OF X RATED GRADE VII+ A5 OR HARDER AID LINES. OVER THE COURSE OF THE FOUR YEARS I PUT UP A TOTAL OF 97 NEW FIRST ACCENTS WITH 135 REPEATS OF PREVIOUSLY UNREPEATED LINES. ALL THE LINES WERE GRADED A5 OR HARDER. ANY PITCH GRADED A3 OR LOWER WENT AT MANDATORY FREE.
THE LAST YEAR WAS MY FINAL TEST. BURT SAID IN ORDER FOR ME TO ACHIEVE FULL MAN STATUS I HAD TO FREE SOLO ONSIGHT THE NOSE AND DOWN CLIMB THE ENTIRE LINE IN LESS THAN FOUR HOURS WITH NO WATER OR FOOD. I MADE IT WITH ONLY 7 MINUTES TO SPARE. THUS BURT AWARDED ME THE STATUS OF KING OF THE NOSE AND GRANTED ME THE PRIVILEGE OF CLIMBING WITH THE ELITE BRONSON.
FOR THE PAST 8 YEARS WE HAVE BEEN PUTTING GIRLS, 5.12+ TRAD CLIMBERS AND PUSSY 5.13 SPORT CLIMBERS IN THEIR PLACE BY DOING SIT START GROUND UP FIRST ACCENTS OF NUMEROUS 5.15 TRAD LINES AND X RATED A5+ LINES.
CURRENTLY BRONSON AND I ARE WORKING ON WHAT WILL BE THE FIRST 5.16 LINE IN THE WORLD. STAY TUNED. WE EXPECT TO REDPOINT THE LINE IN LESS THEN FOUR TRIES.
clymbrchk wrote: I <3 BURT BRONSON (dreamy sigh)
I WILL TELL HIM YOU SAID THAT. DO YOU HAVE ANY FRIENDS?
granite_grrl wrote: It's true, RC.com is on facebook, but there's no way I'm clicking your link.
THAT’S UNDERSTANDABLE, YOU’RE A GIRL. IT’S NORMAL FOR GIRLS TO BE AFRAID OF THE UNKNOWN. BUT THE LAST BASTION TEACHES ONE TO EMBRACE THE UNKNOWN AND TO PUSH FORWARD WITH ALL GUNS BLAZING. HOW ELSE DO YOU THINK WE ONSIGHT 5.14?
REMEMBER CLIMBING IS A MANS SPORT. GIRLS AND PUSSY MEN NEED NOT PARTICIPATE. UNTIL NEXT TIME, THE NOSE OUT.
(This post was edited by thenose on Apr 28, 2010, 10:13 AM)
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Post edited by thenose
() on Apr 28, 2010, 10:11 AM
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Post edited by thenose
() on Apr 28, 2010, 10:12 AM
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Post edited by thenose
() on Apr 28, 2010, 10:13 AM
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