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chedontsurf
Sep 26, 2007, 10:32 AM
Post #126 of 246
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some tourons caught me in the parking lot @ Devils Tower and asked what was at the top. I told em it was hollow like a volcano without the lava. Then I directed them to the secret tunnel around the other side. Ha! suckers.
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mikitta
Sep 26, 2007, 12:22 PM
Post #127 of 246
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Q - How do you get the rope up there?
A - We have a harpoon gun and we shoot it to the top.
or
A - We tie it to a trained ground squirrel who runs it through a big bolt at the top for us.
(that always seemed to be the favorite question of wandering tourons at Veedauwoo. The squirrel answer was used only when one of the little beasties was scampering around on some 5.impossible, hoping for us to throw it a peanut).
Q - isn't it dangreous to climb on ropes?
A - yes it is. It's a good thing we aren't actually climbing on the rope, isn't it?
Q - how does the last person get down? (asked when they find you just coming off a rap)
A - Just like I did
Q - well, then who carries the rope down?
A - No one, we leave it there for the next party of climbers. (this usually said as last person down is pulling the rope ;p )
God Bless,
mik
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guccipiggy
Sep 26, 2007, 2:44 PM
Post #128 of 246
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Often heard in gyms.
'They could climb higher because they have that bag behind them (chalk bag).'
I then tell them that they could borrow one from the counter or offer my chalk bag to encourage them.
After failing again...
'It's cause they have those special shoes.'
Try to help them out by telling them they could rent shoes but explain that they don't really need climbing shoes for standing on big holds.
You hear someone letting out a primal scream while climbing then looking over to see that they are climbing a 5.8. 
Someone walks in the gym, looks like at a climb and exclaims loudly 'That does not look like a 5.12'. Then proceeds to struggle on a 5.8
Climbing by the lake where tour boats pass by.
Tourists pointing at us shouting 'Look, climbers!'
We point back and shout 'Look, tourists!'
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calfcramp
Sep 26, 2007, 2:49 PM
Post #129 of 246
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Wow, too cool for school!
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guccipiggy
Sep 26, 2007, 2:57 PM
Post #130 of 246
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Well I got news for you.......
I'm not!
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truello
Sep 26, 2007, 4:35 PM
Post #131 of 246
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dark_zer0 wrote: I hate it when i see new people doing this: "Look at that 5.13! It looks so easy!" *They climb it using ALL colors. They ask the manager a question* "Man these routes are too easy, you got any harder ones" *the manager replies* "Ya, this 5.12 is pretty hard" *soon the guy does it with ALL colors* "Its too easy" he says the manager then replies, "Its hard when you do it in one color" They newbie tries it with ONE color, and couldn't even get off the ground. He soon heads for the 5.5s. (This has happened basically every week Ive been at the gym)
I've been to the gym when (on two separate occasions) some little kid is kinda following me, bouldering the routes that I just attempted. It took me a little while to realize that the kid wasn't looking UP to me, but more looking DOWN to me because he was just sending all of the routes I was succeeding/failing on.
Of course the kid at that point didn't know enough to stick to a route and was using every hold within reach, but it still hurt my ego a little 
(This post was edited by truello on Sep 26, 2007, 4:36 PM)
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shimanilami
Sep 26, 2007, 5:13 PM
Post #132 of 246
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Co-worker: I heard you rock climb.
Me: Whenever I can.
Co-worker: What do you do to stay in shape?
Me: What do you mean?
Co-worker: Rock climbing is your hobby, but what do you do for exercise?
Me: [Sigh]
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extreme_actuary
Sep 26, 2007, 5:15 PM
Post #133 of 246
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Back in '96 I was telling a co-worker about the Everest tragedy. I went into a long explanation of the hazards, techniques, and dangers associated with climbing the mountain. At the end, she asked me "Is Everest the one with all of the faces?"
I sat confused for a minute, and after realizing what she was talking about, I replied "You are thinking of Mount Rushmore."
How difficult can it be to climb Mt. Rushmore if there were dudes up there sculpting faces?
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Carnage
Sep 26, 2007, 5:19 PM
Post #134 of 246
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i been to mt rushmore, it looked so chossy, it would be pretty tough to climb..
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winglessangel
Sep 26, 2007, 5:25 PM
Post #135 of 246
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1) They keep calling us RAPELERS
A friend was belaying me from the summit of Urca's Hill. Tourists kept asking "did you go down here"
A: No, I came UP.
Watching monkeys on the sumit of Corcovado with the rope in my hands, a cab driver comes by:
¨Cool uh? and they rapel faster than you do!!"
---------------
2) They keep calling bolts as HOOKS
"But, those places you go, already have hooks, right?"
¨Do you put the hooks there?"
"Who puts the hooks there?"
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desertwanderer81
Sep 26, 2007, 6:45 PM
Post #136 of 246
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[quote "podunkclimber"]
Being a physics major, and having taken some engineering courses. Egineering is decidedly devoid of math in comparisson of my current classes. I was like, "Where are all the proofs? How do you derive that? Why do the problems give me actual data? You where looking for me to solve it numerically, not symbolically?" Yet I don't get math analysis classes at all.[/quote]
In my college, we had a very good theoretical foundation so everything started with a differential equation or something of the sort and then we went from there.
After graduating college, some things I do require a metric shit ton of engineering, and then other things I do require absolutely none. I find that the further I progress professionally, the less math I use.
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teleguitar4
Sep 26, 2007, 6:59 PM
Post #137 of 246
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You know how when you get down from Devils tower you get the normal questions about whats up there and how long did it take and then they ask if they can have a picture of you. So the last day we were there me and my buddies after climbing go up to some people and are like "Are you hikers?" They answer back with a confused yes. So we say "Well can we have a picture with you guys?" They seemed pretty confused but we were laughing are asses off
(This post was edited by teleguitar4 on Sep 26, 2007, 6:59 PM)
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shockabuku
Sep 26, 2007, 7:00 PM
Post #138 of 246
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desertwanderer81 wrote: [quote "podunkclimber"] Being a physics major, and having taken some engineering courses. Egineering is decidedly devoid of math in comparisson of my current classes. I was like, "Where are all the proofs? How do you derive that? Why do the problems give me actual data? You where looking for me to solve it numerically, not symbolically?" Yet I don't get math analysis classes at all.[/quote] In my college, we had a very good theoretical foundation so everything started with a differential equation or something of the sort and then we went from there. After graduating college, some things I do require a metric shit ton of engineering, and then other things I do require absolutely none. I find that the further I progress professionally, the less math I use.
Here's a mathematical statement for you:
Is there some context for this comment in this thread? = What the f*&k?!!?
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mikitta
Sep 26, 2007, 7:17 PM
Post #139 of 246
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Reading the rest of the thread will shed enlightenment :P
God Bless,
mik
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desertwanderer81
Sep 26, 2007, 7:43 PM
Post #140 of 246
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mikitta wrote: Reading the rest of the thread will shed enlightenment :P God Bless, mik
lol yeah, funny how it helps to know what someone is talking about when you read the thread.
Go figure.
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mikitta
Sep 26, 2007, 9:16 PM
Post #141 of 246
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:p The engineering discussion bit came into it around page 3 or 4.
God Bless,
mik
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desertwanderer81
Sep 26, 2007, 9:18 PM
Post #142 of 246
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mikitta wrote: :p The engineering discussion bit came into it around page 3 or 4. God Bless, mik
Yeah! But I wasn't here then. Engineers always have to weigh into a conversation when people are talking about technical or professional things having to do with engineering ;)
It's in our blood!
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mtnjohn
Sep 26, 2007, 9:33 PM
Post #143 of 246
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Climbers ARE TOURIST!!!! There is no difference. Get over yourself!
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desertwanderer81
Sep 26, 2007, 9:38 PM
Post #144 of 246
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mtnjohn wrote: Climbers ARE TOURIST!!!! There is no difference. Get over yourself!
Not entirely true. Climbers are akin to "Natives of the Rock" rather than fat tourists who step outside of the car, snap a picture, and quickly jump back inside in the off chance that they might actually breathe something that is clean.
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mtnjohn
Sep 26, 2007, 9:46 PM
Post #145 of 246
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Natives of the rock!? Why are we so self important. we climb rocks! BFD. Have fun your way and let others have fun thier way. Climbers are not some superior breed of outdoor enthusiast.
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desertwanderer81
Sep 26, 2007, 9:51 PM
Post #146 of 246
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mtnjohn wrote: Natives of the rock!? Why are we so self important. we climb rocks! BFD. Have fun your way and let others have fun thier way. Climbers are not some superior breed of outdoor enthusiast.
Certain people are supirior at different things. Sailing junkies are masters of the wind. Scuba junkies are masters of all-that-be-under-the-waves. Surfing junkies are masters of the waves themselves.
Rock junkies are masters of ..... the rocks! Heh, that rocks.
Anyhow, during the winter/fall/spring, I spend more of my awake hours climbing than I do in my home so I don't think it would be a terrible stretch to call the rocks my home. I think that many others here would be willing to make the same claim (well, maybe rock gyms are their home :p )
edit: got rid of the weird angelic thing.
(This post was edited by desertwanderer81 on Sep 26, 2007, 10:14 PM)
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artm
Sep 26, 2007, 10:05 PM
Post #147 of 246
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desertwanderer81 wrote: mtnjohn wrote: Natives of the rock!? Why are we so self important. we climb rocks! BFD. Have fun your way and let others have fun thier way. Climbers are not some superior breed of outdoor enthusiast. Certain people are supirior at different things. Sailing junkies are masters of the wind. Scuba junkies are masters of all-that-be-under-the-waves. Surfing junkies are masters of the waves themselves. Rock junkies are masters of ..... the rocks! Heh, that rocks. Anyhow, during the winter/fall/spring, I spend more of my awake hours climbing than I do in my home  so I don't think it would be a terrible stretch to call the rocks my home. I think that many others here would be willing to make the same claim (well, maybe rock gyms are their home :p )[/angelic]
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mtnjohn
Sep 26, 2007, 10:08 PM
Post #148 of 246
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You're right. climbers are the superior race of beings. One who climbs is one with the rock. The rock is our home. We are natives of the rock! blah, blah, blah. yadda, yadda, yadda.
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desertwanderer81
Sep 26, 2007, 10:09 PM
Post #149 of 246
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artm wrote: desertwanderer81 wrote: mtnjohn wrote: Natives of the rock!? Why are we so self important. we climb rocks! BFD. Have fun your way and let others have fun thier way. Climbers are not some superior breed of outdoor enthusiast. Certain people are supirior at different things. Sailing junkies are masters of the wind. Scuba junkies are masters of all-that-be-under-the-waves. Surfing junkies are masters of the waves themselves. Rock junkies are masters of ..... the rocks! Heh, that rocks. Anyhow, during the winter/fall/spring, I spend more of my awake hours climbing than I do in my home so I don't think it would be a terrible stretch to call the rocks my home. I think that many others here would be willing to make the same claim (well, maybe rock gyms are their home :p )[/angelic] Since you're the Master of the rock, please ask the rock to stop killing so many n00bs.
Rock demands a sacrifice.
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desertwanderer81
Sep 26, 2007, 10:13 PM
Post #150 of 246
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mtnjohn wrote: You're right. climbers are the superior race of beings. One who climbs is one with the rock. The rock is our home. We are natives of the rock! blah, blah, blah. yadda, yadda, yadda.
You've never felt a spiritual connection between yourself and nature when you climb?
And not superior in general, which you have a lovely way of puting words into my mouth, just that there are places where they are home. Tourists are by their nature, in a place where they are not home.
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